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Writer's picturePam Buchholz

Finding "Your Space"...

It's truly important for you to create special space or spaces for yourself. The space needn't be big or grand – in fact, some of the best special spaces are small and intimate. They can be inside or outside - it's great if you can have places in both.



This is a space where you feel most comfortable with yourself…where you feel an inner calmness, a place where you are able to tune out your busy world for a few moments and just breathe.



"Your Space" - where you can focus your thoughts, put things back in perspective, be Inspired…..read a book, write in a journal, think creatively, work out a problem or challenge your facing, or just enjoy this moment in time…..a place in which you can be fully present with your surroundings, and that simply, just makes you feel better!

What elements do you need to find or create “Your Space” - maybe it's natural light, or shade, warmth, or coolness, do you feel better when you have plants, trees, or greenery close by? Are there natural sounds that you like, or do you prefer silence? Do you need comfort like a blanket, a rug or chair? Or are you happy sitting on the sand, grass, a floor, or a flat piece of stone? “Your Space” may be in your bedroom, kitchen, apartment, house, barn, yard, garden, a beach, a lake, local parkland, nearby river, a public library, truly anywhere.

With some imaginative thinking you can create "Your Space" wherever you want - a place where you feel inspiration is all around you.


A Piscean, I truly am a water sign – I need the element H20 not only to survive, but to thrive. I feel an incredible calmness when I can be near water - being born and growing up in a small coastal town, probably plays a big part in this. With miles and miles of wide, sandy beaches - this was where I always headed to when I needed to think, to clear my head - the feeling of the salty breeze on my face, the sound of the crashing or lapping waves, the ever changing, ever moving water. Some of my earliest memories, are of my Mom taking me to the beach during the summers. She would walk us to a beautiful beach, where she would spread a large blanket on the sand, and we would stay most of the day. Just playing in the sand, paddling in the water, and eating the simple lunch of sandwiches that she had made earlier that morning, which always tasted so much yummier, when eaten on the beach...….and then the long walk back home, still smelling the salty sea air, feeling the warmth of the late afternoon sun on our skin - with no care or worries in the world.



Ayr Beach in Scotland, where I spent many long summer days

(The isle of Arran in the distance)

As I grew up, the beach was a place that I would go to feel better about teenage heartaches, have late night parties, escape arguing parents, try to forget about school pressures etc.….and as I was older, it was the place I would go to find calm and think through my own marriage problems, work challenges, money worries, it was even the place I grieved for the loss of my father – I would find solace, my broken heart would start to mend and my spirit recover, when I could be on a beach…..next to the Atlantic Ocean.



Dunure Castle and beach, where I used to spend alone time, deep in thought, or just appreciating the beauty around me

Over time, I realized that I didn’t have to be by the sea to find this inner tranquility and calmness - it could be a river, swimming pool, stream, lake, pond, waterfall….any body of water. Maybe being born in March, and therefore Piscean🧜‍♀️, also plays into my affinity with water. In fact, some of my best "aha" moments are when I'm in the shower!



When I worked in London, I would often try to find time to wander along the Thames to clear my head and feel rejuvenated

Through the years, when stressed out about different issues, as many do, I began not being able to shut off at night, and found it difficult to get to sleep. And the more you worry about not sleeping, the more you can't sleep - a vicious circle I'm sure some of you are all too familiar with. I discovered that I found it easiest to fall asleep when I could hear water…..rain on the roof, a running stream, the lapping of waves on a lake or the crashing of waves on a beach. Unfortunately, there wasn’t always a water sound that I could hear whilst in bed……So you can only imagine how happy I was with the invention of sound apps for your phone. I can now listen to raindrops on my roof without it having to rain, a babbling brook, although I cannot hear one from my bedroom, and of course...crashing waves on a beach, even when I've travelled away from my beloved Hatteras home 😊



Whilst water never solves my problems for me, it does help me to be calm, and clear my head of cluttered thoughts, so I may focus and rationalize. Water also gives me the peace to relax when I need it most - it enables me to remember the many things I'm thankful for, the things that make me happy, and truly grateful.


I find my calm on Hatteras beach

Over the years, I have evolved a comfy/cozy "go bag", so that wherever I am, whatever I'm doing, and whatever the season, I can always make myself just that little bit more comfy and cozy....help to make it "my space", even if it is only for a short time. Obviously it changes a little between summer and winter, but the key elements are always there...My journal, pen (spare pens as there is nothing worse than your ink running out when you're writing down your latest inspiration or idea!), my lightweight puffy blankie, small bottle of water and snack, sunblock and of course my phone, so I can take pics. The bag and blanket are exceptionally lightweight, so it's super easy to throw over your shoulder. I always throw my "go bag" in the back of Jake (my Jeep) when I'm going anywhere, as I never know when I may decide to pull off the road and just spend some "me time" watching my world, taking photos or writing.




When I walk to the beach, I always take my "go bag" so once I find my favorite spot, I can sit on my blankie (or in the winter wrap myself up in my blankie, which is awesome!), drink my coffee and be inspired by my beautiful Atlantic Ocean 😊


I have already created several special spaces around the Inn, and at the beach close by - places I can go when I just need to escape from my sometimes hectic, crazy world. As you continue on this adventure with me, I'll introduce you to some of the places I can be found around the inn and Hatteras, and I'll no doubt create some new ones along the way, as I continue to explore my world!

Coffee on the sunrise ferry to Ocracoke

Do you see how important it is to understand what gives you a feeling of calmness and tranquility? – Knowing what elements create this environment will help you create “Your Space”, the place where you can escape the hustle and bustle of your life and that enables you to switch off, relax and breathe….

So here is the challenge - It took me a long time to recognize that water was one of the main elements that centered me, and helped create the environment I needed to be at my most thoughtful.......I invite you to spend some time thinking about your surroundings? Explore your senses? Find that place where you feel an inner tranquility that transcends your busy life, where you can calm your thoughts and see clearly - recognize, acknowledge and claim this place as "Your Space" .

I’d love to hear about the special spaces you find and create, please feel free to comment or e-mail me.


Until next time, "have fun finding "Your Space"












Love and Hugs,

Pam 😊


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6 Comments


Jan Burris
Jan Burris
Apr 12, 2021

Beautiful and thought-provoking piece of writing. You are very talented & creative with words. And it makes me happy that you sound like you are in a place of much content and happiness. Can not to read more and see/hear about the progress you're making on The Inn.

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Pam Buchholz
Pam Buchholz
Apr 13, 2021
Replying to

Thank you so much - I'm super happy that you enjoyed my writing, more of the ramblings of my mind 😊 For me, the best writing is the kind that comes straight from your head and your heart, written exactly as you thought it. Writing exactly as I think, means you get to meet the real me...humans are extremely complicated and beautiful beings, who for many reasons, often feel the need to write the way they think people want to hear from them, or the way they want people to see them...even if it's not who they really are. I'd just rather you know the real me...even if it isn't always dolphins and rainbows 🐬🌈 Take care

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I love the idea of your mobile space, as well as an at-home space. At home, to find peace, you have to bring your boundaries inward, other wise you will always find things you need to do.....there goes the peace. Outside, you can expand boundaries as far as you can and need to, to find that personal space. Of course, present day social distancing helps with that!

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Pam Buchholz
Pam Buchholz
Apr 13, 2021
Replying to

Thanks Liz 😊 I really think it important to be able to find that special place that you can find calm, even in the craziest of situations - an escape to my sanity. A couple of items that make me comfortable wherever I go, make that possible, and it's so easy to do - just keep that little "go bag" handy 💗. Take care

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LuEllen Huntley
LuEllen Huntley
Apr 09, 2021

I enjoy your blog posts, Pam, and am looking forward to my stay in early June at The Atlantic Inn, formerly The Seaside Inn. I, too, am a water sign; my birthday falls under the moon child constellation of Cancer. My sister Connie Duncan whom you've met is also a Pisces--she's super creative and fun. She and her husband Steve Duncan LOVE their home in Hatteras. As a water sign I can become boggy at times. I also write. This helps me keep flowing and stave off the bog. Absolutely love your pictures of Ayr Beach and Dunure Castle and will do a bit of research to learn more about this area of Scotland. I let a friend borrow my…


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Pam Buchholz
Pam Buchholz
Apr 13, 2021
Replying to

Thank you so much Lu - I'm so glad you're enjoying my posts, I have such fun writing them. My beloved, late Grandma was born under the sign of cancer too...special water babes 😊 I was incredibly lucky to have grown up in such a beautiful part of Scotland, steeped in history and natural beauty. We're looking forward to you visiting with us in June, and I'd love to chat more about Scotland when you're here. Take care

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